Autonomy isn't a trait that simply appears with age. It's a skill that is learned, nurtured, and allowed.In many educational and residential settings, we observe children who are overly dependent on adults, not because they lack the capacity, but because they have not had real opportunities to develop it. This is especially common in environments where overprotection has been the norm, whether due to fear, external demands, or adult insecurity.
This article raises a reflection on how professionals can promote autonomy from our intervention spaces. It's not just about encouraging them to do things on their own, but about creating conditions that allow them to feel competent, capable, and confident in acting on their own, knowing they can make mistakes and try again.
Autonomy as a basic psychological need
The need for autonomy is part of our development as human beings. It involves being able to make decisions, influence our environment, and feel that what we do stems from an internal choice. In childhood, this is expressed through small acts: choosing what to play with, deciding how to solve a problem, exploring a space freely. But for this need to be expressed, the environment must facilitate it.
In overprotective contexts, the possibility of choice is often negated. Answers are given before they ask, actions are taken before they try, decisions are made for them in the name of caring. This not only limits the development of practical skills, but also weakens inner security and the sense of personal competence.
Differentiate autonomy from independence
It's important not to confuse autonomy with independence. A child can be independent even if they still need help with many tasks. Autonomy does not mean that they do everything alone, but rather that they actively participate in their own process., who can make decisions within a secure framework and feel responsible for their achievements.
Educating for autonomy is accompanying without invadingIt's allowing exploration, accepting mistakes as part of the process, and offering emotional support without constant direction. It's a relationship that trusts the child's ability, even knowing they'll make mistakes or take longer.
Practical keys to cultivating autonomy
From an educational or residential perspective, there are many concrete ways to foster autonomy. They don't require major changes, but rather a willingness to observe, wait, and accompany:
- Suggest age-appropriate tasks and allow them to complete them at their own pace.
- Offer real options to decide (how to organize their space, what clothes to wear, what activity to choose).
- Validate the effort rather than the outcome. Acknowledge when they've tried something, even if it didn't turn out as expected.
- Tolerate the child's frustration without trying to resolve it immediately. Support with words, not quick fixes.
- Encourage reflective thinking with questions like, “What could you do differently next time?” or “What helped you solve this problem?”
Frequent obstacles from the adult world
Often, the difficulty in promoting autonomy lies not with the children, but with the adults. We struggle to see them get frustrated, make mistakes, or take longer. We feel the pressure of time, results, and external judgment. Sometimes, we want to protect them from making mistakes, when in reality, we're depriving them of valuable learning.
In professional settings, there are also inertias that go against autonomy: rigid protocols, excessively hierarchical structures, and controlling dynamics. Challenging these practices is part of educational work: designing more flexible spaces, offering gradual responsibilities, and recognizing children's voices in decisions that affect them.
The positive impact of autonomy on development
When autonomy is promoted, the benefits are multiple. Children develop greater self-esteem, tolerance for error, initiative, and emotional regulation. They feel useful, capable, and valued for what they do, not just for what they accomplish.
Furthermore, in residential or educational settings, fostering autonomy strengthens coexistence: it reduces emotional dependence, encourages shared responsibility, and improves the overall atmosphere, as children feel an active part of the group's functioning.
Educating for autonomy doesn't mean leaving children alone, but rather being present without constantly intervening. It means trusting their abilities, offering respectful accompaniment and allow error to be a legitimate source of learning.
From our position as professionals, we can facilitate this process. We can create environments where making mistakes isn't a failure, but an opportunity. Where making decisions isn't a burden, but a right. Where growth isn't just about adapting, but about building oneself with purpose.
Would you like to delve deeper into intervention with minors and work in this area? We inform you about the Postgraduate in Intervention with Minors.